Sammantha
Senior member
- Joined
- Aug 11, 2007
- Messages
- 501
- Country
- Uni
- State
- NC
- City
- Newport
Hi everyone, having a hard time sleeping..... anxiety, nervousness... I think i need to up my prescription. I saw my doc in November for my follow up, now i go back to have ANOTHER emg and physical therapy session on the fifth. Then ofcourse there will be another follow up visit. The doctor told me to ask questions next time as he was leaving. The doc walked me to the check out desk, this doc is quite the gentleman. Anyways, i am afraid to ask if i have a possible MND.. Not because i dont think i have it but because i do not want him to think i am diagnosing myself. As far as he knows, he knows i have clinical EMG weakness, brisk reflexes and clonus but thats it. He does not know that i understand everything the EMG says or that ALS/MND is on my mind. I think my anxiety is coming to ahead because of holding all of this in. This is the only place where i let anything be known. Ofcourse my mom and husband know different but thats it.. Its like that saying you are only as sick as the secrets you keep..... I cant reveal anything until i have a sure fire diagnosis whatever it is and my husband's company had another meeting with him about getting me off there insurance! Just because i see a specialist, and even though this is highly unethical and possibly illegal, my husband has to keep his job......... My job is a year to year contract and what if they decide they dont want to keep someone who is potentially sick or going to affect insurance rates.... Then i will be screwed.... I have so much anxiety and anger built up, i am completely frustrated......................I still cling to the possibility that i do not have ALS because my signs/symptoms are progressing VERY slowly. So there is that chance. How do i cope in the meantime without having a nervous breakdown! Thanks Sam