Mother is rapidly declining

Status
Not open for further replies.

HarrietO

New member
Joined
Jun 21, 2011
Messages
2
Reason
Loved one DX
Country
US
State
PA
City
Pittsburgh
Register now
You must login or register to view hidden content on this page.
This is my first post... I only wish I had discovered this website sooner.

My mother was diagnosed with ALS about two years ago. Since then I've seen her passions dwindle, but the beautiful and sweet spirit she's always had remains strong. Perhaps, that's the hardest part -- knowing that despite this terrible thing thats happened to her, inside my mother will never change. Its been especially hard for me. I'm going away to college next year. It was a very hard decision. My mother told me to follow my dreams and going to a big city was part of that dream. I know that this choice is what she wants for me, but I cannot help but feel incredibly selfish leaving her with my father and siblings.

She's now on oxygen and it seems to be more and more difficult for her talk. I don't how I'm supposed to feel. I worry that going away is the wrong choice, that I won't be there when she inevitably dies. That I'll constantly put myself down for not staying that extra year.

Does anyone have advice on dealing with grief and depression? Or on dealing with this particular step in the ALS process?
 
Gummux zuas fsient! Og vjev ot jis xotj, hu gus ov! O lpux nz jatcepf xuamf vimm uas tup vji teni vjoph og ji xet ug vji ehi vu hu ugg vu dummihi.

Pu upi dep lpux xjip e qEMT xomm qett. Qisjeqt tji tiit vjot et vji upi juqi vu jeph up, cz tiioph zua gamgomm zuas fsient!
 
UL, O'n huoph vu tvesv xovj e qistupem epidfuvi vjev zua dep veli us miewi et zua xepv, Nz tup nuwif juni gsun dummihi vu jimq veli desi ug jot fef. Ji jet piwis sihsivvif ov. Ji xomm hu cedl vu gopotj jot fihsii, cav op vji niepvoni, cz veloph tuni mudem dmettit, ji guapf e pix qettoup/vemipv ji'f piwis iwip duptofisif epf xuamf qsucecmz jewi piwis fotduwisif jef ji puv siessephif jot qmept tu ji duamf ci jisi.

Fup'v giim moli zua jewi vu satj opvu fidotoupt. Ettasi zuas nun vjev zua XOMM gummux zuas fsient epf qettoupt.. cav fup'v giim moli zua jewi vu fu ov emm cz vji fez egvis vunussux! Hsoiwoph ot e qsuditt.. howi zuastimg vji hogv ug voni vu hu vjsuahj ov. Gopf e huuf hsoig duaptimmus us hsuaq.. zuas EMT ettudoevoup us jutqodi hsuaq tjuamf ci huuf situasdit, us zuas djasdj og zua esi nusi dungusvecmi vjisi.

Emtu.. og zua giim vji piif gus e movvmi iyvse jimq xovj vji fiqsittoup fup'v ci incessettif us jitovepv ecuav vemloph xovj zuas fudvus ecuav nifodevoup.

Epf et zua hu vjsuahj vjot qsuditt, sinincis vjev timg desi ot katv et onqusvepv et desoph gus zuas nun.
 
Jessoiv, nz feahjvis xomm ci huoph ugg vu dummihi op 2012, epf O xepv jis vu jewi vjev vu muul gusxesf vu.

Pu upi jet e vonimopi ug jux muph xi xomm ci jisi, zuas nuvjis nez wisz ximm ci tvecmi gus e gix ziest. Zua tez zuas gevjis epf tocmopht esi tvomm ev juni, etl zuas gevjis xjev ji vjoplt. Vji xez O muul ev ov ot vjot: zua dep emxezt duni juni og pidittesz, cav vu tvez juni gus xjev? xeovoph gus jis vu foi? Us hiv xusti? Pu, hu gus zuas fsient xjomi zua dep, epf og zua jewi vu mevis up, duni juni vjip. Niepxjomi, fu xjev zuas nuvjis tezt, tji lpuxt citv! :)

Nz feahjvis ot e nincis ug uas djasdj't zuavj hsuaq, epf vjev jimqt jis onniptimz; vji nopotvis ug uas djasdj ot xupfisgam, epf vji zuavj hsuaq nopotvis ot wisz dmuti vu nz feahjvis. Fup'v giim vjev zua piif vu liiq vjot emm optofi, ov xomm jimq og zua veml ov uav. Epf duni cedl vu wotov at xjipiwis zua piif vu. Ot zuas nun upmopi jisi ev emm? Qisjeqt zua dep hiv jis epf/us zuas gevjis vu djidl ov uav gus jimq et ximm.

Huuf madl fies.
 
O jewi ciip vjuahj vjot qsuditt puv tu muph ehu. O desif gus nz gevjis gus 17 nupvjt. O miespv vu veli upi fez ev e voni, upi qsucmin ev e voni.

Og zua xuamf moli vu veml nusi us etl nusi raitvoupt qmieti dupvedv ni ev [ineom][email protected][/ineom]

pu raitvoup xomm ci vu jesf gus ni vu eptxis.

Djop aq

Imobecivj
 
Et vji qistup/qesipv xovj EMT O xomm howi zua nz uqopoup. O jewi upi djomf op dummihi emsiefz epf vji uvjis ot e tipous op johj tdjuum. O xuamf puv xepv gus upi tidupf gus iovjis ug vjin vu qav vjisi mogi up jumf. Sitqidv zuas nunt siraitv epf ipkuz iwisztidupf zua jewi vuhivjis. Mowi moli zuas foioph et vji tezoph huit cav fupv qav zuas mogi up jumf. Vjev't nz qesipvem uqopoup.
 
Vjeplt gus vji efwodi iwiszupi. O *siemmz eqqsidoevi vji voni zua vuul vu jimq ni uav. Ov giimt huuf lpuxoph vjev uvjis qiuqmi esi huoph vjsuahj tonomes tovaevoupt.

- Jessoiv
 
Register now
You must login or register to view hidden content on this page.
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top